, its unimaginable. We have talked about waiting and everything but we like the idea of spring 2012 which is plenty of time to get excited. I recently got engaged, and I love this man more than anything, but I am not excited to get married and have a wedding. Its not about a big proposal, its about being on the same page. Hopefully you can both calm down and enjoy your engagement and the rest of your lives together!! Don't get bogged down with doing wedding-related things every chance you get. I've been in a relationship for 10 years with a truly great person. I'm not excited about marrying him We chat at 1. I'm just so sad and so resentful about this that I've felt myself growing distant from him and I'm not even excited for him to propose anymore. Ours will be just about six months, it's felt fairly busy always doing or thinking something wedding-related without a lot of down time. Be happy for her. Sure, but their judgments are their problem, not mine. Of course I love my fianc and I am excited that we are getting married but my wedding doesn't seem real. I am hoping once we settle on a location and date things will be more fun. People put too much emphasis on having a picture-perfect proposal; it's not about the pictures or the story. Please keep all rude comments to youself. Of course these are not the only reasons, but they are near the top. It really hit me at the rehearsal and then I got super excited. But this time around you'll have to fight the urge to call him. He needs to figure out why he never did it. My fianc and I went shopping twice together, picked out the ring together, bought the ring together, picked up the ring together when it came back from being resized. - Think about the parts of the wedding you are excited about, whether that's your first dance, the cake, or even your honeymoon. As always, he advocated for nonviolence, boycotts, and peaceful protests. President Bush left his reading appointment at an elementary school to fly to New York and stand among the rubble with emergency workers and press surrounding him. When not together, you text constantly. Imagine that someone being the one who carried you for 9th months in their belly, taught you how to walk, fought with you about little things that only a mother and daughter relationship could understand. Please don't sell yourself short. ", Wedding Planning When Fiance Is Not Excited Or Involved, When we think about Playboy, we cant help but think of it as a sticky-paged magazine shoved under some teenage boys mattress. Blah blah blah. I could get sick or my fianc could get sick. It's going to be messy. He had months. He loves you when you're cranky, when you've been sick, when your hair is shit and you're in your PJ's. Do be careful throughout wedding planning that you don't get too caught up in how things are "supposed" to go or what you had imagined. You have a good point. I had seconds. Youre never going to go to your 10-year high school reunion and rekindle the flame with that lacrosse player who teased you, but by now will have Instagram stalked you and realize how cute youve become. You all have no idea how much I need too hear all of these kind words and have so much support. You've built a program, CB. Pre-ring, he debated and decided about his readiness. I love my fiance and don't ever not want to be with him, but I feel I am doing a disservice by not being excited for our wedding. The wedding day could very well be my own line in the sand, one Im ready for this time, and one on the other side of which Ill have someone else legally obligated to panic right alongside me. For a few days we celebrated and even took a little sailing trip to the British Virgin Islands, and I almost went cross-eyed from staring at that diamond up close. Between COVID resurgences, billionaire takeovers of social media, and whatever t, Its officially winter: Do you know what you and your partner are doing for the holidays? There is a time when finances will be discussed but it's not now. Arent You So Excited To Be Getting Married? Choices about flowers, colors, and dresses are far smaller than deciding to commit to a person, but they've opened a conversation about what my fianc and I want things to look like and how, now, we'll make choices big and small together. My now H and I had been together for five years when he took out a loan for something I thought was stupid and immature. Its not fair to complain to him that your friends are proposing why not us because then he feels forced to propose before hes ready. It's nothing about the actual wedding/marriage that is wrong. Less than an hour after the speech's delivery, Congress approved for the United States to formally join the Allies in WWII. The oration is in great contrast to much of his campaign, which was marked by him actually speaking poignantly very little. I thought this was a practical joke, but it wasn't it was the real deal. Latest activity by Cynthia, on August 9, 2018 at 8:45 AM. Make a list. But then, slowly but surely as we resumed our daily lives, I felt more and more despondent. With everything we just discussed, it's not surprising. He is my best friend. I couldnt quit my job at all without talking to my husband-to-be. And in regards to your girlfriend communicating that your mom seemed excited about the idea - Could have just been a miscommunication. If you're anything like me, winter break is a much-needed light at the end of the tunnel after a long, stressful semester. While I wouldn't put too much stock in the fairy tale proposal, I would expect the man you've been dating for 5+ years and who wants to spend the rest of his life with you should know your level of sentimentality and, when he "misses" is a little apologetic, and not accusatory. Mine didn't come until a couple weeks before the wedding. The casual sex and the lack of transparency we have with our peers are absolutely unappealing. If you cant find out why he delayed then you wont be able to let go of that resentment, and if you cant let go of that resentment youll never be happy in the relationship. Showing us just how unwavering it plans to be. Thanks for sticking with us for a full year. You love this guy because he's your closest friend, but you're not attracted to him and you don't want to marry him. I cant make sense of everything right now, but I can look at the Spring 2017 calendar and say yes to May. I can totally see my H getting pissed and hurt that I thought his proposal was crap. The one thing I have learned throughout this entire process? I think when we go get our marriage license that will be a thing. And when you close that door, you close a lot of other doors, too. Honestly, it was a pretty bad proposal, but it makes an interestingstory and no matter what, it's MY proposal story, so I'll choose to remember it as something good and I tend to look at the humor in it, rather than the disaster in it. What to Do When You Are NOT Excited About an Engagement Announcement -- Do You Fake It? Didn't get down on his kneedidn't even really ask me to marry him. She's posting here because she's not happy. Welcome to Dont Yuck My Yummm, Unbotheredssexual wellness columnand dig, I know its not just me when I say its been a stressful year. To this day, he is the only president to willingly step down from an active term. I know a couple who've been engaged for about 7 years. Not everyone cares as much about the party, and that's 100% okay. Just five months before his assassination, President Kennedy traveled to Berlin to reassure the citizens of West Berlin that they were approved of-- and protected-- by the United States. I promise I'm not the most cynical person in the worldcheck out what I have to say! Your mom made an asshole comment, and I hope she realizes it. Perhaps I am being overly rational and should go with my gut, but I am afraid of making a mistake. Your mother doesn't seem to approve. Treat Yourself To 60% Off R29 Reader-Favorite Sex Toys At The Lov How Former Dominatrix Venus Cuffs Is Topping The Nightlife Industry. I have to ask - do you actually want to marry this man and spend the rest of your life with him? don't worry it will come. Your FI loves you. So maybe busy doesn't help? Don't be afraid to keep things classic and traditional if that will simplify things for you. My (37/f) boyfriend's (37/m) friend (68/m) has been My (36f) sister (34f) was in an abusive relationship (she Press J to jump to the feed. I try to remind myself of that when The Knot (magazine) likes to tell me that the cheapest weddings they cover cost $30k). Engaged. Maybe you just need to get over the stress hump and that giddy feeling will hit you soon. You can have a countless number of father figures in your life, but really as my mom always said, " you only get one mom.". If you're so nervous and anxious that planning your wedding and marriage isn't enjoyable, then that's a big red flag. It would be so nice to have someone who supports me, who I can talk to about anything and who can cuddle with me. And if, You can start the talk by saying something like, "I want this to be our wedding, not my wedding," Dr. Hartzell says. There's a difference between genuinely not having an opinion and saying something like "Do we have to talk about this again? I have a slightly different take on it. May 27th still seems so far away. I'm concerned that he didn't have the maturity to do so nor the fact that he knows her well enough to know to give her a little time to cool off. Barack Obama, who stepped to the forefront of politics after delivering a powerful speech at the 2004 DNC, defeated Republican John McCain and became the first non-white man to serve as the president of the United States. I'm so ready to get it over with and stop talking about floral arrangements and linen colors. Rehearsal Dinners, Bridal Showers & Parties. Planning is stressful! Discover new workout ideas, healthy-eating recipes, makeup looks, skin-care advice, the best beauty products and tips, trends, and more from SELF. . However, none of those are correct. That sticks out to me and leads me to agree with what ClimbingBrideNY said above. My FI and I run up against this on birthdays (which I blow WAY out of proportion) and getaway weekends. FYI, this is who you are now: engaged. It's not a red flag. You've probably done this at least once in your life or at least seen a tweet where someone posted their screenshots with a potential love interest. ago. I have been engaged since December 2014 so I just feel like its been forever. /r/Relationships is a community built around helping people and the goal of providing a platform for interpersonal relationship advice between redditors. Now I thought, God Ill never get back there. I think you are focusing too much on the actual proposal and not thinking about the fact that you are engaged (yay!) That's an amazing thing. You fought because he forgot a present. Is it just hanging out or is it more than hanging out? You're not alone, I totally feel you. Any information published on this website or by this brand is not intended as a substitute for medical advice, and you should not take any action before consulting with a healthcare professional. Have I accomplished everything I wanted to before I get married? But, she ended up sitting down and having a good heart-to-heart with my mom and they got everything worked out between them and my parents are pretty happy withhim now. After a month my boyfriend decided to join me for a couple of weeks + we planned a weekend in Miami. Post-ring, Im debating and Im deciding. The terrorist attacks of that fateful morning made another date which will live in infamy. I'm sure there will be plenty of time to figure out the details in the coming months." They'll take the hint. We've been together for 5 1/2 years. The Real Housewives of Atlanta The Bachelor Sister Wives 90 Day Fiance Wife Swap The Amazing Race Australia Married at First Sight The Real Housewives of Dallas My 600-lb Life Last Week Tonight with John Oliver. not excited to be engaged. Youre never going to have another first kiss, period. Like many women, I'd pictured the moment my then-boyfriend would propose to me. Maybe you just aren't a huge "party" person. The place you grew up helped shape you into who you are and chances are what you were desperately trying to escape when you left for college doesn't seem quite that bad anymore. Here are just a couple of things you might experience when you're back in your hometown for an entire month: Honestly, this might be the most exciting part of break. Not Excited Over My Engagement The Knot Community Well let me start off explaining how I got engaged and maybe that can also help you girls see clearly where I come from or correct me if I am exaggerating. Thanks girls for sharing your knowledge and opinion with me. He said he forgot so I was a bit disappointed,we started arguing aboutit and I was trying to read a book at the time and all of a sudden he gives me out of nowhere a little wrapped box. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. I'm not trying to infer something about you specifically, OP, but I want to put it out there that brides also should put less emphasis on the wedding itself and more on the marriage. I am totally, 100 percent fine with that, but it doesnt help me plan, because I know those are things that just cannot be planned for. :-P. I found my engagement ring on a Monday night when we were both in our ratty PJs. Even though it has been four years, that doesn't mean I haven't been interested (slightly interested) in anyone since then, but there hasn't really been anyone that has interested me enough to date. Getting engaged can be depressing. I didn't want to hire a planner. No matter how many times people tell me not to stress about it, I have a really hard time not stressing because I still want to be involved in planning my wedding. This is bullshit. Its meaning became the battle cry of an impoverished people, who were relying on the charismatic, newly-inaugurated Roosevelt to lead them through the valley of the Great Depression. All of that other stuff should not matter! All traces of fight were swept away and she was thrilled to be engaged. If you are engaged and you aren't sure you should be getting married, STOP PLANNING THE WEDDING. I woke up on the morning of June 3rd to my father relaying to be the worst nightmare of my life. It never seemed close enough to get excited for. THANK YOU SOOO MUCH!! Why are you assuming people are going to be rude? It was perfect. Don't worry I'm 29 days away and feel the same. 5. Learn More 475 Anonymous Upvoted by Quora User Your gut knows this is over. I kinda feel like I have been putting on a front to people. His years of training for church and excellent education make him not only articulate, but inspiring too. So we were sitting there waiting for the shuttle bus, and he pulled outhis wallet, opened it and insidehe had the ring safety pinnedto it(he was worried he's lose it), and says "I wanted to do this better, but, um so will you?". Of course, part of wedding planning is making your imagination a reality, but it's really easy to get carried away and freak out over not being able to pull off X or Y cool thing and losing sight of the whole point of the thing: marrying your FI. The Lifetime network stuff does exist (well, some of it). If not, just remember you are not her. Mumsnet carries some affiliate marketing links, so if you buy something through our posts, we may get a small share of the sale (more details here). Will you accomplish anything by pooping on their party? Can you tell her what she's missing? We've been dating for almost 5 years. Now, Im with someone who wanted to propose and so he did, not one sad conversation had to be had. 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